No One Mourns the Wicked
by Elphaba Fiyerobert
Summary: Adam Lambert has nothing left to live for. He is friendless, jobless, talentless, hopeless with no way out that he can see. Suicide, depression, angst warnings. Adommy meantion. This is A DEATH FLICK! be warned. Also touches on the sad passing of Cory, this is not written as disrespect or a wish for anyone to be hurt. Dont like don't read.
1. Chapter 1

**No One Mourns The Wicked**

**Chapter One**

_**Authors Note DO NOT READ THIS FLICK if suicide scenes, funerals or the meantion of Cory's passing will upset you. This is an angsty in the extreme form of the word death flick. You have been doubley warned, so NO HATE on this story thank you. It is just a story and no wish for any of the people listed or used to come to any harm. That is all.**_

Adam was a broken man, he'd lost his boyfriend Sauli a few months ago. Caught him in bed with his best friend when he had got back from work early one night. Sauli had blamed it all on Adam's long working hours, fame and touring. Funny he had been happy enough to abuse that said fame to his own bitter ends to launch his own career these last few years. Now he hadhis own tv show he didn't need Lambert anymore and made that painfully clear when he left to move in with the friend. Adam felt betrayed by both, he'd been completely in love and thought that said feeling worked both ways. Clearly he had been gravely mistaken.

The WAG tour had been terrible, he couldn't consentrate on anything other then his own pain. The booked venues were rubbish, and the security a joke. They kept taking cameras off fans even after he had told them constantly he allowed filming of his concerts so it really was none of their business. His managers were being funny about his new album he wanted to put out, kept refusing the suggested tracks leaving him more and more desperate to get it all perfect then usual. They were controlling his look into some 80's boyband reject and wanted an 80's cover album as well. He knew that would end his career completely. They just wouldn't listen to anything he or his fans said anymore.

Just when he had thought things couldn't get any worse, he was shocked once again. Firstly his manager ran off with half his fortune, then his record label dumped him for refusing to do the covers album. Then just as the depression was really starting to set into his bones deeply to top it all off, his friend Cory that he was due to start working along side of in Glee and he had know for years took an OD.

They were the same damn age, that shook him to his soul. The boy had been due to get married in just two weeks tome, not she was all alone in the world. Made Adam wonder why such a souless bastard as he was could still be alive when someone so sweet and good was gone. They had been at the same party, taken drugs from the same batch. It could so easily have been him dead instead right now. Infact Adam had gone to his hotel room to check on his friend when he said he didn't feel well It had been just minutes since his last message, but by the time he had gotten there it was just too late. His friend had already died.

That was more then he could process right now. Adam took to hiding in his apartment drinking the day away. Nothing else to do with himself anymore. Glee was on unlimited hold, American Idol couldn't decide if they wanted him or not, and finding a new label right now wasn't as easy as it seemed. Not with his clear to the eye 'differences', seemed he would never be seen as anything other then the gay guy.

Adam even stopped checking his phone, no one ever check in on him, no one cared. He had no real friends anymore, just those like Sauli who sponged off him or Drake that sold pictures of them to the press. Even the band didn't seem to care about him now. Days and nights blurred into one, just a waking nightmare that he couldn't escape from as he kept drinking himself into a stupor to escape the pain he felt. The first call he had in a week was his Mom, she was sick they thought it could be cancer. He put the phone down too numb to even answer her back. Taking a huge swig of his drink. Adam knew how he had just hit rock bottom, he just simply could not take a single thing more. It was time to leave this cruel, selfish world behind him, but first he would take care of those he loved who hadn't hurt him yet.

That was only a couple of people, those with a special place in his heart. Even though in the deep pit of depression he was in he was cursing them for not noticing or caring. Part of him wanted to rant, rage and demand where were they right now when he needed them? That he had always been there for them when they had needed support no questions asked! Why didn't they care about him anymore? What was so fucked up about him, tainted and disgusting that no one wanted him. No one loved him anymore? Did they all wish he was dead? Did they talk about it behind his back? Playing some fucked up cruel game to push him over the edge?

Adam sunk another double, pulling out his laptop to do a few bank transfers of the small fortune he still had left. Some to his Mom for her Doctor's bills, most to Tommy to launch his solo career, some to his old bestie Allison for the same reasons and the rest to Cory's widow. Not like he needed money where he was going. He also set up some meeting with local record labels he had favours owed from for Glitterkitty and Allicat so they could have all they had ever hoped for or wanted without him.

That now done, a strange calm fell over Adam. It was time to leave now, and that fely amazing. To know there was an end in sight to all of this pain and misery he had endured for so very long. He ran a hot bubble bath, something to relax into just to enjoy his last few hours alive. Taking more pills then he could ever imagine it could take to finish him. Swilled down with way too much good whisky. Adam settled down into the bath after undressing hurriedly to allow them to take effect. Slowly slipping into the first real sleep he had gained in weeks.

Feeling so drowsy now from the cocktail he had taken combined with the warm scented water. He sighed contentedly knowing he was free now. That alone wouldn't be so bad where he was going to. The after life had to be better then this. Anything had to be better then his hellish life, even if there was nothing after death and he just faded away. At least he wouldn't be in all this pain anymore.

His ipod that constantly played in the back ground slipped into playing 'No one Mourns the Wicked' from his favourite musical as he slipped under. Thinking absently that it was so damn true. He was a wicked man, no one could ever mourn his passing. No one would ever lay a lily or a rose on his gravestone. No one would notice he was even gone, when you are wicked you truely do die alone.

He couldn't have been more wrong, if he had just stayed awake a few minutes longer he would have heard his phone frantically ringing over and over again. He would have known that Tommy was trying to reach him, that he was actually loved very deeply. Perhaps if he had answered that call he could have asked for some help before it was too late. Perhaps he would have found himself a reason to live again just by knowing that someone still cared. That there really was someone who loved him so very deeply in this cruel world.

But none of those things that could have saved him happened, Adam had given up fighting now, he wanted to leave. He slipped into a dreamless black sleep. The sleep of the eternal kind, the sleep that in time healed all wounds.


	2. Chapter 2

**No One Mourns The Wicked**

**Chapter Two**

Authors Note Nope sorry guys and girls, this is a death flick so no last moment saving of his life. Although i have to say i was crumbling to wanting to save him by the time I'd finished writing chapter has been one of the hardest things i have ever written, but its good practise in angst. Don't kill me, cause it has a kinda sweet ending just wait and see.

The world grieved the passing of the great Adam Lambert. Twitter erupted with Glamberts wailing at the loss of their idol. Tributes constantly being posted up online. Hell Adamweloveandmissyou trended worldwide for a solid week as a memorial. People talking about the bullying treatment which ahd lead to the young man's death. Friends coming forward to admit to what they knew about the cheating. Sauli publicly stated how much he regretted the act knowing now it had led to his death. The band was in pieces, Adam had been such a happy person on teh outside that they had never noticed how broken he was. When he had vanished offline for a few days no one had really paid attention, just assumed he was busy with work. It happened all the time, so they had no reason to doubt the intentions really.

Tommy cursed himself for not coming sooner, for not trying to get to the love of his life. He'd given him space to see if Adam could sort out his feelings over his friends death by himself without him fiddling. Tj had been busy with his own work, and kept checking the man's twitter and his phone, but nothing. He assumed wrongly that if he was needed then Adam would call him. It was only after over a week had passed he started to worry, calling him several times that night, and the next morning. Slightly concerned, but expecting to find Adam nursing a hangover or in bed with some twink he had found in a bar Tommy had used the spare key to let himself into the house to check up. It had been him who had found the body in the bathtub ice cold, called for help and had to be pulled hysterically away from trying to CPR the body back to life.

He couldn't wrap his head around the fact that Adam was gone. That he'd never be dragged into another frantic fever kiss or have his guitar jerked off on stage during band intros. Never be covered in too much make up and glitter by the greatness that had been Adam Lambert for tour again. One of the greatest lights in the world had been plucked out now leaving it a little greyer and sadder for the loss.

Tommy would never forgive himself for not having saved Adam's life. They were best friends, he should have noticed the signs, should have helped him through it all. Everytime he had asked how he was getting on lately Adam had just grunted fine and he had accepted it at face value. Oh yeah Mr Chatterbox suddenly going silent and he hadn't noticed, what an idiot! He should have seen through those thinly veiled lies, not been so wrapped up in his own life. That was something he was going to have to live with for the rest of his life. The guilt of knowing he could have saved the man's life if he had only tried, but he hadn't.

The funeral was very public, Glamberts came from all over the world to attend and pay their respects. For those who couldn't fit inside they broadcast the funeral on a big screen outside and live streamed it so not a single fan had to miss out on saying a final fairwell. Tommy knew thats what Adam would have wanted, to be with his fans to the very end. He had always worshipped them, still remembering that very first time he had been asked for an autograph. He'd been such a big kid, loved every single second he had spent with them. Never forgetting they were what made him famous, without them he was just an odd gay man who liked music as he had once put it.

The ceremony went ahead slowly with a lot of tears shed, a few speaches from Adam's family and friends. The absence of one Thomas Ratliff was sorely missed even in the crowds of love being issued that day. Tommy himself watched it all online, alone, with a big bottle of whisky as his only companion. He just couldn't face people, not today. He couldn't help but think that if any of these people now saying how much they cared had shown this level of affection before then Adam would still be alive, healthy and well.

He still half expected the door to open, Adam to be stood there all smiles shouting "April Fool". Oh how he wished that would happen. That this would all be just a dream, a terrible stinking nightmare and tomorrow he would wake up back in his usual life again. Cuddled up in bed again head on Adam's chest as they had fallen asleep watching Velvet Goldmine together again. He didn't think he could ever watch that film again now. He didn't think he could play guitar, hell he didn't think he could breathe without Adam being by his side to guide him.

Tommy waited half the day until the graveyard was quiet of visitors before he arrived. It was almost time to lock the gates, but the caretaker nodded and let him in anyway understanding his need for privacy. Tommy stared at the headstone reading the inscription he had picked over and over again.

_Adam Lambert_

_He made us want to listen to music again. _

_A shining beacon of light and hope in a cruel cold world. _

_Forever missd, forever in our hearts._

Sinking to the ground infront of the grave he lay a single white rose down among the million tributes. Letting the floods of tears finally fall he had been holding back desperately since the death. "You fucking idiot Lambert, why didn't you come to me? Why didn't you ask for help?" Tommy raved, "I could have fixed this, made it all better. Damn it Adam all the things i never told you because i thought we had all the time in the world for it. Now i never can!"

He curled into a ball at the base of the headstone sobbing. "Adam you stupid prick, I'm in love with you, and i never got to tell you that. Now you will never know, you killed yourself thinking that no one cared. I care, more then you can imagine. Jesus what i would give to be able to tell you those words and to see you just one last time to say goodbye".

Words failed him, as the grief crashed in, his walls smashed open knowing he had lost the only thing in his life he had actually cared about. The caretaker had to half carry him away before he caught his death of cold as well.

"Goodbye Adam, I love you." Tommy said tearfully as he was pulled away.

As he turned he heard a faint voice he knew so damn well from behind him, one that couldn't be there. It comforted and tore him apart at the same time. "I love you too Tommy Joe, I'll be waiting for you forever." Tommy pulled away violently to look back at the grave, seeing Adam stood there at his graveside dressed in all his leather clad finery. "Live your life baby, and when its done i will be waiting. Have a wonderful one baby, life it for both of us." he asked before disappearing.

Tommy was shaking now, "Did you see that?"

The other man shook his head, "Come on bou you are upset, you need a hot drink and some sleep."

The blonde stared back one last time before following, wondering if it had been real or fantasy.


	3. Chapter 3

No One Mourns The Wicked

Chapter Three

Authors Note: Yes I know this flick was finished with the loss of Adam, but due to popular request I have added an extra scene to get the boys back together. Enjoy.

Tommy did as he was bid by the specter, he lived his life never forgetting his true love in all that time. He made music, brought out countless albums, lived the high life. Without Adam though it all seemed meaningless. The glory turned to ashes in his mind. He drank too much, regularly took drugs anything really to try and escape and survive the loss. The only thing he refused to do was fall in love again, to risk opening himself back up to such agony once more. Sure he had partners, his bed was never empty of a little sweet company, but nothing ever touched his ice cold heart.

Outwardly he lived, thrived even, but internally he was dying, slowly fading away a little more every single day. Tommy had never been much of a person for company other then his beloved, now he was completely withdrawn. Whenever he wasn't working, he would be at home drinking himself into a stupor over call of duty or watching porn. Otherwise he spent his time cruising bars getting hammered looking for some guy to take his pain away for a moment.

He had been bisexual all his life, but since the funeral he hadn't been able to look at a woman sexually again. If only he had come out sooner, perhaps he wouldn't have lost the greatest part of his life. Perhaps now he would be happily married to that sweet magical man or at these the candle of his life wouldn't have been extinghwished so abruptly. At least Adam would still be alive, if only he had been faster at seeing how much pain the other man was in. Tommy knew deep down that everything that had happened was his fault and his alone, he could have stopped it if he had just tried harder.

Eight long years had passed now since the funeral, eight years finding his fame and fortune, eight years filled with nothing but the pain of his loss. Thomas refilled the glass of whisky he was supping from, today was his 40th birthday and he was completely alone in the world. He'd been drinking for hours, days maybe it hardly seemed to matter anymore. In the background on his computer he had the clip on repeat from you tube of Adam's 31st gift to him. The last birthday they had ever spent together. "31 the new 21 where you know what you are doing or at least think you do." Those words etched into his mind along with that long steamy kiss he had received on the glam nation tour after enter the sandman for his birthday back in the day.

He and Adam had had so many years together, yet so far apart as well. Those long passionate fever kisses, the nights of even more passion after the shows. Then his father had passed away and Adam was there for him through it all, but Tommy had closed up emotionally so much and then they weren't officially dating. So he couldn't really hold it against the raven when he had started up with Sauli to find himself a little happiness in return.

Adam asked him if it was cool, why hadn't he turned around and said no you are mine and no one else is ever gonna touch you again? Instead of a mumbled sure and going back to his guitar to play his blues away. A thousand ways he could have fixed things for a better life together. He had always been too much of a chicken shit to even try to give them a go, too scared to admit his massive gayness to himself. So scared that he would be abused for it, stupid when half the band past and present had been gay or at least bendy with it. How could he accept everyone else's sexuality, but not his own? He had always just felt like a filthy fag like the haters called him so many times for the heated kisses on stage. Adam had clearly guessed his secret, but even when they had slept together many times he never asked or pushed the point just let it be until Tommy was ready to talk about it. But he had never been ready, never tried to explain, damn it he'd given up on them before they had even started.

Sobbing into his glass Tommy prayed for another moment with his lost lover, even though he had never believed in God. Thinking about his life, his mom was gone now too, his sister happily married. He had few friends, the one thing he wanted the most was missing. He didn't want to do this anymore, not live in this lonely miserable half life. The only thing he wanted was Adam, the pain of loss was meant to fade in time yet today he felt it as keenly as he had the first day. Thinking about the graveside and that strange specter the last time he had seen his love.

Spurred on by the idea Tommy packed a few bottles of whisky, a load of sleeping pills and his guitar, to go and see Adam. At first he had visited every week, then once a month, now he hadn't been there since he placed a wreath for the man's birthday it just hurt too much to be there. He drove even in his extremely unsober state, parked up and took his things to the graveside having to climb the fence to get in. The gates having been locked long hours before then.

He sat there a while in silence after taking the pills, drinking like a fish and mournfully plucking whatever chords came into his mind. Tears mixing with the sweat on his hands from strumming. "Damn it Lambert I miss you too much." He mumbled.

A cool hand on his shoulder, "I miss you too baby, but I told you to go live your life. I don't see a lot of living going on, just enduring onwards. You need to live, love, enjoy your life not mourn me forever."

Tommy grabbed the hand tightly not daring to turn around incase it vanished. "You are real?" he asked softly.

Adam kissed his neck, "I'm as real as you need me to be tonight, happy birthday my glitter kitty."

He hadn't forgotten, all this time and he still wished him a happy birthday that was just insane, but meant the world to the blonde. "There so many things I wish I had said to you while I still had time to. I wish I had done everything I could to make you mine."

"Oh sweet glitters, I always knew how you felt. I should have waited for you forever if that's what it took. Everything just got on top of me and not in a good way, I should have asked you." He whispered back in his ear.

Tommy turned and their lips met in a crash of passion, slamming Adam back against his head stone as their long ignored needs surfaced. "How are you even here?" he asked when they finally broke apart.

Adam stroked his face and shrugged, "You needed me, I wasn't gonna go anywhere."

The blonde cuddled into his arms, his eyes closing at the familiar scent surrounding him. "I wanna stay with you forever." He murmured.

"Tommy to do that you have to die too, I can't let you do that. Your whole life is in front of you still, another 50/60 years of it. I can wait, you need to as well." Adam pressed.

"I have aids." Tommy answered.

"Oh dear Gods, what happened?" Adam asked pulling him closer.

Tommy sighed, "I was drunk, I got careless and I didn't use protection. Seems I've been careless about a lot of things lately it seems. I'm dying, I want it to be my way not pumped full of drugs lying awake in a hospital bed waiting for my time to come." He showed the empty pill pots that had been lurked behind his back.

Adam snatched them, "Oh my Ra what did you do? You could live years in a normal enough life with aids before it got to that choice."

"I have six months to a year, and I would be in hospital within three. I'm not living like that, I'd rather go out while I can see myself still not some walking skeleton." He shouted.

Adam dragged him into a bone crushing embrace kissing him tenderly.I'm sorry baby, so very sorry."

"Just promise me that I have something waiting for me?" Tommy sobbed, "I never believed in a God or an afterlife, but you are here right? So there's gotta be something? I don't wanna just die and lose you, I want us to be together again so damn much."

Adam's heart broke at the man in front of him falling apart and trying to understand it all. All the shit he had suffered all alone these last eight years. "Nothing is ever gonna part us again." He promised.

Tommy yawned into his chest, eyes fluttering shut a moment before he forced them back open again. "Good." He slurred tiredly.

Adam settled leaned back against his gravestone (that was such a weird thing to experience, you aren't meant to see your own grave.), and laid Thomas's head on his lap. "Just sleep baby, let yourself drift off and I will take care of your forever." He felt the boy settle into his arms, yawning that adorable kitten yawn he always had. Stroking his hair, gently humming to send him into that eternal slumber as the drugged stupor kicked in. Taking his leather jacket off to keep him from the chill ground, protect him as he experienced his mortal death. At least in these last moments his kitten wouldn't be alone to face the uncertain future.

The Next morning the grounds keeper found the blonde's body curled up on top of the grave covered in a grubby glitter splattered leather jacket that looked identical to the one Adam was buried in. A huge contented smile on his face, along with a splattering of lipstick kisses. A faint smile crossed his own lips knowing that finally the boys were reunited. In the distance he thought he heard a few bars of fever being played on a ghostly guitar, as an ethereal voice sung along with the tune.


End file.
